Pride cometh before a fall…..eth.

“I’M DOING AWESOME AT SPANISH!”

Oh no.... wait:

“I’VE LEARNED NOTHING THE ENTIRE TIME I’VE BEEN HERE!”

Those two statements are the extremes and not really my thoughts, but I do bounce between one side and the other of that spectrum of thinking.

I will have a day or moment when I feel like I have just nailed the conversation.  We will be in class and I will know a word my classmates don’t, remember the conjugation for a word when others can’t or without help, or just understand the directions the teacher gave and feel pretty good about my progress in Spanish.  There are times when I will talk to the teachers or someone on the street or at church and the Spanish flies out of their mouth quicker than an F-15 taking off.  I don’t miss a beat but understand most of what they say and I am able to adequately respond and have an actual conversation (albeit a short one).  I walk away with a smile on my face and a dance in my heart.

Then it happens.  I see someone else I know and they come up to me and start talking to me:

“Hola.  ¿Cómo está?”  In that moment the only thing I can do is look at him and say,

“I don’t speak any Spanish.  What did you say?”   I walk away not with a smile on my face but with teeth gritted in frustration- and not with a little man dancing for joy in my heart, but that same man lying on the floor screaming in pain as he just broke his ankle trying to dance.

Just a few days ago in class we were talking and the teacher asked when I study.  I knew enough Spanish to joke and tell her, “Oh I don’t study because I have already learned all there is to know about the Spanish language.”  I think she knew it was a joke- she laughed and then said something I couldn’t understand as it was in Spanish.

Obviously I have moved on past “hello, how are you?”  But, God does a good job of recognizing when I am getting a bit too confident and cuts me back down to size.  I have never gotten so frustrated I felt like crying, nor excessively prideful in my linguistic abilities, but either one could happen at times.  Fortunately, the pride does come before the fall so anytime I am getting too confident, God helps me to remember I know approximately 2.8% of what I need to know and will be a lifelong student of this language.  In the same way, when I get to the point of being frustrated and prefer to stop talking or listening, He helps me to have a moment of success to show me just how much I have progressed.  He is definitely a good God that gives us exactly what we need- whether we think it is a “good” thing or a “bad” thing that has happened- God gives it to us so it is good for us.